A Good Cry

Sometimes you just need a good cry, you know? But, for a busy mom like me when do I get the chance to just let it all out? Well, for the past few weeks it has been during my only alone time in the car on the way to the grocery store. For a while we were doing our shopping all together as a family, (another tear inducing experience) but lately I have been just taking the list and going at it alone - which is much more enjoyable! But, as soon as I get in the car and put on the music, the tears start coming and they don't stop until I get to Whole Foods and pull myself together. Then, once I am in the store and shopping I am fine. It's like I need to just let it out and then I am good for another week. Am I weird? (Don't answer that!)
In other news, my dad is getting married next month. Yes, I said next month, not next year. Why yes, that was quick. How do I feel about it? That's a good question. I'm not really sure, myself. I am happy that my dad is not lonely and that he has someone to make him happy. I certainly would never wish for him to be lonely and miserable for the rest of his days. It's just so hard to see him with someone who is not my mom. His "moving on" is the reminder to me of the finality of my mom being gone. She's really not coming back. (Which I know, intellectually - but when that reality hits you emotionally, it hurts.) I am trying to be happy for them and trying to deal with it like an adult, but part of me wants to just curl up on the floor tantrum-style and scream out, "I want my mommy!"